


a state of grace

by toomoon (jjjat3am)



Category: Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Regency, Bathing/Washing, F/F, Found Families, Huddling For Warmth, Mutual Pining, Sharing a Bed, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:21:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 20,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23639761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jjjat3am/pseuds/toomoon
Summary: “Ah, Seulgi, my dear,” her father said, simpering, “I’ve just been telling the good captain all about you.”"My lady Seulgi,” Joohyun said in greeting. Her voice was soothing, low, with a seemingly ever-present undercurrent of command. “It’s good to finally make your acquaintance.”“Likewise,” Seulgi said, offering her hand to shake. Joohyun surprised her, grasping her hand with surprisingly calloused fingers and sweeping into a bow to press a soft dry kiss to the back of her knuckles.or,in which Seulgi is the daughter of a disgraced nobleman with no particular prospect of a bright future and Joohyun is the most decorated female officer in Her Majesty’s service, who whisks her away to her mansion in the highlands.
Relationships: Bae Joohyun | Irene/Kang Seulgi
Comments: 63
Kudos: 496
Collections: Sprout and Blossoms - Round 1





	a state of grace

**Author's Note:**

> Members of NCT are mentioned in this fic, as well as small hints of Johnyong and Markhyuck. The rest is all lesbians.
> 
> I wanted to thank the Sprout Blossom mods, for their kindness and patience with me, and for organizing this exchange. I also need to thank Chrisi, for looking this over and making sure it's presentable. Thanks also to Rene, for not laughing at me when I dramatically wailed about being bad at lesbians at 1am. Y'all are the best.
> 
> This is for Mina. I love you. We've been through a journey together and this is only a small gift in return for what you've given me over the years. I wish I could be there when you read it for the first time. I'll see you soon.
> 
> Enjoy!

Seulgi folded her hands demurely in her lap, resisting the urge to fidget and re-adjust her skirts for the umpteenth time. She’d been left to her own devices after the maid left. After examining all the paintings in the sitting room, as well as the view of the red climber rose from the window, the room left little in the way of entertainment, and she was hesitant to stand up and touch anything, worried that she’d knock something over and bring more shame to herself than was already apparent in her situation.

Somewhere in the depths of the mansion that the sitting room belonged to, her father was extolling her virtues to the person that would possibly go on to become her future spouse. He was hopefully doing so in a way that wasn’t bringing attention to the state of his debts, not that there were many still unaware of her family’s financial situation.

Her mind skittered away from the thoughts of her father and who he might be talking to. She’d been trying to avoid the topic of her impending marriage as much as she could when it was all everyone around her wanted to talk about. 

She’d left fanciful thoughts of a union borne out of love in her childhood. If there was ever any doubt of her duty as a lady of good breeding, they would have been dashed the moment she’d flowered and bids for her hand in marriage started flooding in. Of course, those, as well as speculation on her future spouse, dried up quickly once the matter of her father’s gambling debts became well known. After that, the only conversations about her marital prospects would be such that grew quiet when she walked past. She didn’t need to hear them to know what they said.

You’d have to be very foolish to marry the Lady Seulgi, who had no dowry and barely a penny to her name. 

She’d given up marrying for love a long time ago, but she’d at least hoped to enter marriage on her own terms and with a claim to equality in the relationship. Those hopes were gone now too.

Seulgi shook her head as if that would dislodge the lingering darkness of her thoughts. It wouldn’t do, meeting the person she’d be tied to for hopefully the rest of her life with lingering thoughts about all the things she’d been forced to leave behind. She pushed her thoughts forcibly towards the room’s decor. That, at least, felt safer, if dour and entirely lacking in any sort of taste.

It was also sweltering hot, with early summer sunlight streaming in through the windows and onto the sofa, she was occupying. She was sweating in her dress. It was cherry red and by far the prettiest item of clothing in her possession, but it was far more suited for early spring or autumn than to the oppressive summer heat.

The grandfather clock near the fireplace chimed loudly, startling her out of her contemplation. As the last chimes rang out, she realized she could hear voices. First, her father’s, high and needy, and she suppressed a wince. In between his rare pauses, a woman’s voice, smooth and low. Pleasant. 

As the voices came closer, Seulgi became aware of another sound - a rhythmic tapping of a cane against the wooden floors. When it came nearer, Seulgi got to her feet, ignoring her sudden dizziness.

The door opened slowly. In the square of the doorway, next to Seulgi’s father, stood Captain Joohyun, the most decorated female officer in Her Majesty’s service. She was something of a household name, even now, a year into her retirement, with books and songs written of her triumphs. Her retirement from public life to her mansion in the highlands left to her by her tragically deceased father only lent more mystery to her aura.

The first thing Seulgi thought was that Captain Joohyun was surprisingly short, a few centimeters under Seulgi’s own height. The second was that she was beautiful.

Her eyes zeroed in on Seulgi, intense and unreadable, and Seulgi dropped her gaze, jumping to her feet.

“Ah, Seulgi, my dear,” her father said, simpering, coming towards her, and Seulgi dipped into an inch-perfect curtsey to avoid his grasping hand. “I’ve just been telling the good captain all about you.”

Seulgi barely withheld a snort of derision. Her father barely knew anything about her, so who knows what sort of nonsense he’d been telling her -- her fiancée. Even her brain stuttered over the word.

Captain Joohyun came forward, her stride powerful and unbroken despite the cane that tapped rhythmically against the floor. There’d been an injury, Seulgi had been told at some point, piecing some semblance of the truth together from rumor and hearsay. A lance through the thigh, a knife to the knee, a deranged mermaid taking a bite through her Achilles tendon. Captain Joohyun’s career-ending injury was fuel for all sorts of speculation. Seulgi made herself focus on the cane instead of thinking about it. It was a nice polished walnut with a handle made of jade, carved in a shape she couldn’t see, hidden as it was by the captain’s surprisingly small hand.

Muddled as she was in her thoughts, Seulgi almost missed her approach, until Joohyun was standing right in front of her. She forced herself to look up from the floor, meet her eyes. Somehow, she didn’t think a woman like Joohyun would be impressed by demure.

“My lady Seulgi,” Joohyun said in greeting. Her voice was soothing, low, with a seemingly ever-present undercurrent of command. “It’s good to finally make your acquaintance.”

It was hard to parse if that was a lie or not. “Likewise,” Seulgi said, then took a deep breath and offered her hand to shake. Captain Joohyun surprised her, grasping her hand with surprisingly calloused fingers and sweeping into a bow to press a soft dry kiss to the back of her knuckles. She let go of Seulgi’s hand immediately but she had to fight the urge to fidget with her fingers or hide them in her trailing sleeves.

“It’s simply wonderful that you’re finally meeting,” Seulgi’s father said, bouncing on the balls of his feet. Seulgi kept her eyes trained on Joohyun’s shoes instead of looking at him. They were nice. Smooth leather and the slightest hint of a heel. Sensible. “You know, Captain Joohyun was my protege in the army -”

Seulgi’s eyes darted up in time to see the indulgent look that Joohyun was sending her father. It made her a little nauseous, thinking about what kind of things he must have hanging over her to get her to agree to something like this. It rankled that she was a favor. She schooled her expression, hoping that she was less of an open book than usual.

Joohyun’s voice cut through her father’s blathering, effortlessly commanding attention. “We shouldn’t bore the lady with old war stories,” she said, smoothly gesturing Seulgi towards the sofas. “I think it’s time we talked about logistics.”

She made it sound like they were planning a military campaign and Seulgi had to bite down a hysterical laugh. Instead, she smoothed her dress down and sat where Joohyun had indicated. She fixed a smile on her face that hopefully looked pleased instead of deranged. It wobbled only a little in the face of Joohyun’s inscrutable gaze. 

  
  


*

  
  


The wedding was a quick and quiet affair. Seulgi preferred it that way. It would have been something awful, having to stand on attention for the rest of her extended family (or rather, the relatives that her father hadn’t already alienated beyond repair). 

Words had stuck in her throat briefly, under the officiant’s expectant gaze and she’d had to clear her throat before finally getting them out. Her hands had shaken in Joohyun’s gentle grip but she’d put the ring on her finger on the first try. Her ring for Joohyun was a small, delicate thing, almost too soft for someone with her reputation. It had been the only thing left from her grandmother’s jewelry box, the only thing she could save, hiding it in the pockets of her dresses so it’d never leave her side. She could almost feel her father’s surprise and greed when she’d pulled it out at the final meeting, and she’d gotten through it by focusing on Joohyun’s steady gaze, on the smallest shade of delight in the corners of her mouth.

The ring was the only thing of value she’d brought into the marriage.

It looked like it fit on Joohyun’s hand. She’d caught her touching it once, at the reception, almost absentmindedly caressing the inlaid pearl. It’d made her feel warm briefly, in a way she couldn’t completely identify before anxiety and humiliation swallowed up the rest of her feelings. 

Seulgi liked her own wedding ring. Even now, she couldn’t help admiring the way the precious metal reflected the light from the fireplace, couldn’t stop her hands from running over the grooves and interlocking patterns engraved in it. It had a wide band, and weight to it, one that felt sturdy and steadying instead of heavy. Already, she could feel it settle on her finger, her skin and flesh giving way to its unyielding shape.

Sitting in what would now be her new bedroom, she tore away her gaze from her ring to smooth her hands self-consciously down her dress. The skirt felt soft and delicate under her fingertips, and she fixated on the glide of hands down the soft ivory material. It was a nice dress. Simple and sensible, and most of all, not as expensive as the other options. Joohyun was paying. She knew she was just fooling herself, but Seulgi didn’t want to owe her more than she did already. That she would owe her in the future.

As if summoned by the turn her thoughts had taken, the door to the bedroom swung open, Joohyun standing at the threshold. She seemed to pause, gaze sweeping the room. Seulgi watched her take it all in, wondering what she was seeing. She resisted the urge to leap off the bed and onto her feet, feeling suddenly like an interloper. She’d wondered earlier, who this bedroom had belonged to. 

It was big, twice as big as her room had been at home, the space dominated by a huge four-poster bed, set in walnut with a matching set of drawers across the room. The floor was covered with rugs, concealing polished hardwood floors, but the walls were bare of decoration, except for the set of big windows and a slim glass door opening out onto a small balcony. In the dark, she couldn’t quite make out the view, but she guessed it was one of the gardens out the back of the mansion. There was one other door in the room, leading to a small en suite bathroom that was stocked with essentials but similarly impersonal. Seulgi hadn’t quite had the courage to check the wardrobe to see if there were any clothes hung up. Her own things were only set to be delivered tomorrow.

She’d let herself be distracted by the room, but as Joohyun stepped inside, the door closing behind her with a click, it became hard to focus on anything that wasn’t her. Seulgi willed her hands to still, trying to project serenity.

“Were you waiting long?” Joohyun said, cutting through the silence. The echo of her voice, soft and calm, was jarring enough that Seulgi had to suppress a gasp. “I’m sorry. I was giving some last-minute instructions to the staff. They’re eager to meet you.”

Seulgi managed a small smile, watching as Joohyun stepped further into the room. The tap of her cane was muffled by the rugs. It was a different one than the one she’d had when Seulgi first met her, all polished dark wood and a marble handle, the stone seamlessly shot through with gold. It was a gift from Her Majesty, sent the previous day with a letter filled with effusive congratulations that made the back of Seulgi’s neck burn. The cane matched Joohyun’s tux perfectly, the sharp dark lines of fabric, perfectly tailored to draw attention to Joohyun’s curves, the edges threaded with gold and her military issue boots polished to shine. She’d looked glorious, standing in front of the officiant, and Seulgi had felt her knees weaken when she’d seen her, and it’d had nothing to do with anxiety.

Anxiety was threading through her body now, though, as she sat on the bed, fingers clenched in the fabric of the bedspread, watching as Joohyun shrugged out of her suit jacket and hung it across the back of one of the armchairs sitting in front of the fireplace. Seulgi had added some logs onto the fire herself, too uncertain to call for a maid to do it. The fire cast shadows across Joohyun’s face, making her eyes look deeper, darker, as she turned back to look at Seulgi.

Seulgi forced herself to withhold a gasp at the attention.

“Did you want to wash up first, or can I?” Joohyun asked and Seulgi had to restrain herself from gaping at her in confusion. 

“Um,” she said. “You can go first if you want?”

Joohyun nodded sharply, a small smile softening the edges of her lips. She stopped briefly to open up the wardrobe and took something out, but Seulgi looked away, afraid of being caught watching, afraid that the interest in her face could be misconstrued for something else. 

They hadn’t danced at the wedding. Seulgi had thought it was because Joohyun didn’t want to dance with her. It occurred to her now that it was possible that she couldn’t.

She listened guiltily for the splash of water from the bathroom, trying to catch onto any sign of movement, but there wasn’t any, the door to the bathroom too heavy to let through any sound. The room was quiet, save from the crackle of the fire and her heavy breathing.

She jumped onto her feet when the bathroom door opened. Instead of a nightshirt, Joohyun wore a pair of dark silk pajamas that drew attention to the sharp lines of her body. She walked towards where Seulgi was standing, her expression unreadable. In the absence of the bedspread, Seulgi’s hands wound their way into the fabric of her skirt, her breathing quickening. 

But Joohyun didn’t walk towards her. Joohyun didn’t try to touch her, didn’t try to rip her dress from her body, didn’t try to do any of the things that her governess had told Seulgi husbands liked to do to their wives. It could be different for women, but Seulgi couldn’t imagine so. 

Joohyun calmly walked to the left side of the bed, pushed the sheets aside and laid down, reclining on the pillow. She opened a side drawer and pulled out a book. Seulgi watched her, and felt anxiety bleed into humiliation.

She cleared her throat, which made Joohyun ( _ her wife! _ ) look up from her book. Her face was unreadable and Seulgi almost choked on the words as she forced them out.

“Aren’t we…” she said, embarrassment bleeding hot red across her cheeks. “I mean, aren’t you going to…”

There was a beat of silence where the fire crackled and Seulgi felt the flush spread all the way down her chest. 

“My lady Seulgi,” Joohyun said gently and the pity in her voice made embarrassment spread like nausea through her stomach. “I know you didn’t ask to be bound to me. It would be uncouth of me to force my attentions on you, knowing they were unwanted and unasked for. You needn’t fear that from me.”

Instead of relief like she’d expected, fury rose like bile in Seulgi’s throat and she swallowed it down with difficulty, fighting for control. What was she good for then, if not this? 

Seulgi refused to look away from Joohyun’s dark eyes, expecting her to explain and the fury didn’t abate when Joohyun finally looked away, back to her book. Once again, her face became set in stone and Seulgi couldn’t decipher it.

She hadn’t brought money, or status, or anything of value into the marriage, just her body. And now to have her wife look at it, look at her, the only thing purely hers that she had to offer, and then to reject her? She felt at once humiliated and confused. 

Seulgi turned her attention to her dress, unlacing it in furious motions, too worked up to care when a lace hem ripped or when one of the clasps tore off and went clattering to the ground. She stripped herself bare of her dress and her underdress and her petticoats, right there in the middle of the room, the rug soft but cool under the soles of her bare feet, the silhouette of her body casting unearthly shadows across the walls. Joohyun didn’t look up from her book once.

Seulgi threw the clothing on one of the chairs in a jerky motion and marched into the bathroom, angry enough to be unbothered by her nakedness. She wiped the worst of her sweat and makeup off her with cold water and a towel, and she put on her best nightgown, bought just for the occasion. It was uncomfortable and alluring and utterly wasted.

By the time she walked back into the room, the oil lamp on Joohyun’s side of the bed was turned down and the woman was tucked under the covers. She didn’t even raise her head when Seulgi came in. Maybe she was already asleep.

Seulgi climbed up on the other side of the bed, and thought briefly of tearing the sheets away, offering her body to Joohyun, using what small skill of seduction she had to tempt her, but it felt too much like begging. And for all she was poor, Seulgi wasn’t a beggar.

She laid down on the very edge of the bed, her back towards Joohyun, and blew out the other oil lamp. The position was uncomfortable but she refused to move, her eyes firmly on the darkness outside the window. She’d have cried if she closed her eyes, so she didn’t. She kept them on the window, on the play of light from the fireplace across the glass, and she only closed them when the first colors of dawn painted paths across the horizon.

  
  


*

  
  


Joohyun wasn’t home a lot that autumn. She was always riding out in the mornings, meeting up with her business partners, or with old friends. There seemed to always be some business to oversee, or dispute to judge, or plot of land to visit. 

Her leg did not seem to trouble her on horseback for all it sounded heavy on the mansion’s steps and floors. Seulgi, who’d lived all her life in cities and never learned to ride a horse, tried to contain her jealousy for that kind of freedom.

On clear, warm days, she tried to go out on walks, familiarizing herself with the grounds until she knew them enough to walk them blindfolded. Not that she wanted to. The estate was beautiful, surrounded by forests of tall old trees that provided gentle shade and shelter on hotter days. It had extensive gardens that were slightly overgrown and in disrepair. The gardener, Donghyuck, did his best, but the land had been left to tend mostly to itself for a few years before he was taken on. 

Seulgi spent many a day kneeling with Donghyuck in the flowerbeds, trying to get the roses ready for winter, laughing at his exaggerated despair as the skirt of her dress got muddy and the thorns tore holes in her gardening gloves. Donghyuck was young but hard-working, and he spoke of Joohyun with devotion that bordered on fanaticism. They got close quickly, enough that he shyly confessed to her that he was waiting for a boy to return, a soldier, to finish his five-year contract. They were going to get married when he came and Joohyun had given them her blessing to fix up one of the old cottages that dotted the edge of the property and live there. It made Seulgi a little bitter that Joohyun cared about other people’s marriages more than her own, but she thought she contained it well.

Some afternoons, Seulgi stopped for tea in the kitchen, watching the cook move gracefully among the pots and pans. Taeyong was a little shy but he always had a pot of tea ready for her when she dropped in, along with a freshly baked scone or a perfectly glazed piece of cake. Seulgi enjoyed coaxing him into conversation even though he’d clam up every time John, the butler, poked his head into the kitchen looking for her. It took her less than a visit to figure out that the blush on Taeyong’s face had more to do with the butler than the steam from the stove.

Along with the butler, the estate’s staff was rounded out with Yerim, the maid. Seulgi had liked her immediately, the younger woman’s enthusiasm and good cheer almost infectious. She refused to let Seulgi wallow in bed even when she was tempted to do so. She seemed to know everyone and brought Seulgi gossip from the surrounding villages. It was all about people that Seulgi didn’t know but it was nonetheless entertaining, especially since there was so little going on in her own life.

In general, the estate staff was very young. Almost too young, though they tackled their duties with admirable tenacity. Still, it was often that Seulgi found herself thinking that they’d benefit from some experienced supervision. She thought longingly of her old housekeeper that used to run the household she shared with her father. Eventually the debts had begun to pile up and the older woman had been let go. It had been one of the hardest days of Seulgi’s life. 

The other woman had taught her all she knew about running a household, how to calculate income and expenses, and distribute work. She’d been a mentor of sorts, and in her absence the work had fallen to Seulgi. Not that there was much income to be distributed then. The last time Seulgi had heard from her she was managing a wealthy household in the west of the country. Letters traveled slowly there and Seulgi wouldn’t have known what to say anyway. 

All the staff on the estate was handpicked by Joohyun, given a chance to rise above difficult circumstances. Seulgi slowly put the pieces together - how reverently Taeyong treated food, like he knew how hard it was to be without, how John’s hands shook at loud noises, how Yerim flinched when someone raised their voice, and how Donghyuck was afraid of the dark. They repaid Joohyun’s trust by working their hardest and being totally devoted to her well-being and the upkeep of the estate. That apparently included welcoming Seulgi in their midst.

Faced with the loyal consequences of her wife’s decision making, Seulgi found it hard to hold on to any resentment towards her. Not that Joohyun herself hadn’t made that hard enough just by being herself. 

No matter where she went, Joohyun tried her hardest to make it home to have dinner with her. It was almost always universally awkward, filled with too-long silences and meaningless small talk, and any day now, Seulgi expected that Joohyun would just give up, take the meal in her study just to escape the crushing strangeness, but Joohyun didn’t. 

It gave Seulgi the opportunity to watch her from underneath her eyelashes as she pretended to be focusing on the food. Truthfully, she never could give Taeyong’s hard work the full attention it deserved. Rather, she was preoccupied with cataloging the fall of Joohyun’s hair in the firelight, the way the necklines of her crisp white blouses sat against her tanned skin, and how her military perfect posture unbent into something more relaxed.

If Joohyun ever caught her looking, she’d smile at her, softly, just an uptick of the corners of her mouth and Seulgi would try to smile back before ducking her face down. The tension would thicken, at least until Yerim bustled in with another course. 

After dinner, Joohyun would typically retire to her study to work on her correspondence, while Seulgi settled in the sitting room, working on her knitting or sewing. Donghyuck put holes in his shirts almost faster than she could mend them, and she’d made Yerim promise not to tell him that Seulgi was responsible for the new delicate stitching on his clothes. He seemed to guess anyway, or she thought so because she woke up every day to a new bouquet of vibrantly blooming flowers to accompany her breakfast. 

If it rained that day, there wouldn’t be any new flowers, and Seulgi spent the daylight hours wandering the mansion’s many rooms. They were dusty and full of junk, and valuables lost among the junk. She’d get lost in thought often, leaning against a wall with out-of-fashion wallpaper, imagining how she’d restore it, replace some of the pieces, beat out the dust. It was an old daydream. She’d used to wander her old home the same way, dreaming of putting in new rooms, of replacing the furniture that had been pawned or split apart for kindling in a particularly harsh winter. It was a familiar daydream, and just as futile as it was back then.

Typically, Seulgi retired first, washing up in the bathroom and dressing in a plain cotton nightgown. It buttoned up to the top and came down to her ankles, the opposite of her ill-fated wedding night outfit in almost every way. She was typically already under the covers by the time Joohyun came in, and she watched from under the starched white sheet as Joohyun got ready for bed, leaning her cane next to the nightstand before opening a jar of ointment and rubbing it into her knee. It made their room smell like peppermint and Seulgi found a certain comfort in the smell, lying drowsily in the comfortable bed, watching Joohyun’s shadow dance on the wall. 

Joohyun had two large circular scars, just below her right knee. On in the front, and one on the back of the leg, they stood out stark white against her skin, the tissue strange and puckered. She didn’t acknowledge that it pained her during the day, but there was a certain tightness to her mouth in the evenings after a full day of riding that Seulgi found she didn’t care for.

It seemed to hurt worse when the weather turned, which Seulgi learned one particular evening, with the rain beating down on the windows, the air turned heavy with damp. Joohyun put the cane in its usual place, but as she turned to reach for the ointment, she seemed to overextend her leg, which buckled under her weight. She hit the floor with a muffled thump and Seulgi was out from under the blankets and across the room before she even really realized what she was doing, her arms under Joohyun, helping her carefully sit up.

“It’s alright,” she said softly when Joohyun seemed about to protest. “I’ve got you, it’s alright.”

Joohyun allowed her to support her to the bed and Seulgi fitted her hands carefully around her calves, helping her lift her feet onto the bed. She felt her face flush, and a careful look to Joohyun found her with some redness on her cheeks as well, though that might have been from embarrassment.

Seulgi picked up the ointment jar, abandoned on one of the side tables. Probably Joohyun had been in a hurry in the morning, or Yerim had tidied up and forgotten to put it back in its place. 

With a burning face and burning determination, Seulgi sat on the bed next to Joohyun’s legs and opened the jar. She was watching Joohyun from under her eyelashes, which was why she noticed the way her eyes widened with realization, her hands shooting out to grab at her wrists.

“I’m fine,” Joohyun said, her usual calm voice shot through with an undercurrent of tension. She must have really been in pain. “I can do it, you don’t have to -”

“It’s alright,” Seulgi said firmly, looking up. “Let me help.”

Joohyun looked away first, something in her jaw tightening. Her grip on Seulgi’s wrists, gentle to begin with, eased as she moved her hands away and folded them in her lap.

“Fine,” she said and Seulgi carefully scooped out some of the cream and put it just under the scar. Joohyun’s skin was warm and soft except for the ruined skin around the former wound. Desperate to distract herself from it, Seulgi started to talk.

“I used to work in the hospital during the war, you know,” she said and Joohyun made an enquiring noise under her breath. “At Saint Bartholomew's. I wanted to do something to help.”

There wasn’t a lot she could really do for the soldiers there. Hurt or crippled men and women sent home from the front filled the hospitals to their brim, improvised cots set out in the hallways, the air thick with the smell of infection. Seulgi had fetched and carried fresh linen, changed beds and sewed up cloth until her fingers felt like they were coming off. It didn’t feel like much, in the face of so much suffering.

“Is that where you learned how to do this?” Joohyun asked, as Seulgi gently massaged the cream into the tight muscles, reaching around the calf to touch the usually hidden scar there. 

“Right,” she said, even though she’d actually learned it from watching Joohyun tend to it every night. Absently probing her fingers downward, she found tightly coiled muscle in Joohyun’s calf. Likely it was there because she compensated for the weakness in her knee. Without thinking, she dug her fingers in. Joohyun let out a small sharp sound.

“Did that hurt?” Seulgi asked, worried.

“No,” Joohyun said, though it must have, with how brittle her voice sounded. “You can...keep going. If you want?”

Seulgi smiled a little at the uncertainty in her voice and returned her focus on the muscles, finding the tension and pressing with her fingers until it unwound.

“St Bart’s, huh?” Joohyun said after Seulgi had worked out the worst of the knots and was wiping her hand on the bed linen. “Maybe I’d seen you there before?”

Seulgi tidied up the jar, without looking at her, too-aware of how red her face was now that her hand still tingled from the mint in the ointment and the warmth of Joohyun’s skin. “Maybe,” she said noncommittally, “were you there a lot?”

“Sometimes I came to check on the soldiers under my command who were stationed there,” Joohyun said. Seulgi darted a look her way but couldn’t read her face. “I think I would have remembered you though. If I’d have seen you.”

“I take after my father,” Seulgi offered, rising up from the bed to cross towards her own side. “You would have probably made the connection.”

“Right,” Joohyun said, “that’s what I meant.”

Seulgi climbed onto her side of the bed and curled up under the covers. She thought Joohyun was about to say something else, but the feelings churning in her stomach already felt like too much, so she turned onto her side, and said: “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” Joohyun echoed her softly and blew out the oil lamp. 

Seulgi held still until Joohyun’s breath evened out in sleep. Then, and only then, did she let herself turn around and slide ever so slightly closer. Just close enough to feel the warmth of Joohyun’s body. 

  
  


*

  
  


Winter cast a blanket of snow over the estate. It muffled the sounds of the forest and cast the house into a sort of bubble, the cold air drawing everyone inside and almost cutting them off from the outside world. 

Donghyuck retreated into the kitchen, sitting in the warmest nook and chattering at Taeyong until he had to go outside to bring in the firewood and Yerim frequently joined them. The sound of their laughter echoed in the hall, drawing a smile to John’s face as he carried an armful of missives to Joohyun’s study and occasionally a letter or two to Seulgi in the sitting room.

Winter meant Joohyun stayed home.

It was a strange disturbance, the first time Joohyun stayed home in her study while there was sunlight. Seulgi knew rationally that she had stayed home before, but she hadn’t felt as aware of her as she did now, trying to focus on her book while trying to listen for the echo of Joohyun’s voice in the hallway, imagining the scratch of her pen on paper. She got used to it after those first few days of unrest, but still sometimes caught herself lost in thought only for Joohyun’s voice, a burst of noise when John opened the study door, to bring her back to reality.

There was even less for Seulgi to do in winter. She stayed confined to either the bedroom or the sitting room, where the fire blazed merrily and chased the winter chill away from the corners of the room. Still, she found herself wearing her warmest dresses, and wool stocking and shawls even in the house. 

She and Joohyun had forgone their dinners entirely, choosing to eat all their meals in the kitchen with the staff instead. It became a much livelier meal, with Donghyuck and Yerim sharing stories while Seulgi gently corrected their manners at the dinner table. On a whim, she even asked Yerim to unpack the nice silverware so that she could teach everyone which spoon to use with a certain meal and the polite way to ask someone to pass the bread rolls. 

Even Taeyong could occasionally be persuaded to sit down with them and not just hide among the pots and pans, usually when Joohyun explicitly told him to join them, or when John asked him very nicely. Seulgi took advantage of it to tell him how much she enjoyed the food, followed by a chorus of compliments from everyone else that had Taeyong red as a lobster and hiding his smile behind the tablecloth.

It was nice. Almost like family.

Still, Seulgi spent her days alone. She wrote letters to her friend Seungwan, who’d married in the city and was talking about starting a family, her letters so full of colorful anecdotes of whirlwind balls and beautiful people that it made Seulgi almost ashamed to write about her mundane and quiet life. 

Otherwise, she either knitted or read books to pass the time. The estate had a well-stocked library with titles that were surprisingly modern. It made her think about Joohyun, ordering all these new books and wondering why, because she’d never actually seen the other woman reading something for pleasure.

It was a mostly uneventful season, at least until one day when Joohyun came marching into her room, as ruffled as Seulgi had ever seen her, and practically threw herself into the other armchair, cane clattering to the floor with a careless sweep of her hand.

Seulgi almost dropped her book of William Blake’s poems in her fright. “What’s the matter?” she asked carefully, keeping her tone gentle. 

“It’s nothing,” Joohyun said, but the way she was scowling at the fire proved otherwise. Seulgi stayed quiet and eventually Joohyun heaved a sigh and leaned back, turning to look at her. “I was taking a look at the ledgers and the total number doesn’t make sense and I can’t figure out where the problem is and I just -”

She huffed moodily, and Seulgi had to fight to repress a smile. “I see,” she said, still keeping her tone soft. Joohyun’s dark eyes met hers and held, and after a moment, the other woman seemed to soften, all the tension melting out of her.

“I’m not good with numbers,” she confessed. “In the army, I had a lieutenant who was good at that kind of thing and who I trusted, so it wasn’t a problem, but now I can’t exactly call her in to do my household expenses can I?”

Seulgi dropped her eyes to the book in her lap. She squeezed her hand tightly around the spine, anxiety winding into a knot in her stomach. 

“Maybe I could take a look?” she offered tentatively. 

Joohyun looked up from the fire, watching her curiously. Seulgi wet her lips and started again.

“I used to do this kind of thing for my father’s household and I know it’s not the same,” it wasn’t the same, of course, it wasn’t, her father was perpetually broke and that wasn’t exactly a ringing endorsement for her own skills. “Maybe I’ll notice something you missed?” she finished lamely.

Joohyun was watching her, her expression suddenly unreadable and Seulgi swallowed around a dry throat.

“Not that I’d presume to find anything you’ve missed,” she offered quietly, suddenly too aware of what she’d implied. “It was a silly idea -”

“Alright,” Joohyun cut her off. When Seulgi looked up, she was smiling one of her enigmatic smiles. “Come take a look. Maybe you can save me.”

She picked up her cane and strode out of the sitting room at the same pace as she burst in, forcing Seulgi to drop her book and rush after her to catch up. Joohyun’s study was only a few doors down from the sitting room but Seulgi could only remember being there once, while Joohyun was away. 

It was a beautiful room, done in a dark wood, almost all the walls were covered with floor to ceiling shelves, filled with books, some of them so old that Seulgi would have been afraid to touch them. The tall windows overlooked the gardens and let in plenty of natural light, but the desk was still surrounded by a few half-full oil lamps and some beeswax candles, burnt almost to their end. The desk was heavy and littered with papers and books. In the center of it, splayed open, was the household ledger.

Seulgi withheld a gasp, admiring the old book. It was massive, with thick paper pages, the kind that kept ink well without fading and it was halfway filled. She could only imagine how many generations it covered. 

A household ledger could tell you a lot about the family it served. It held records of harsh winters and bountiful summers, all the incomes, and expenses lined up in neat little rows, just waiting to be interpreted. Seulgi’s hands itched to touch it, sweep through the generations. Who felt a craving for rhubarb cake? How much wood did they have to buy to warm up the house twenty years ago? Who bought a cradle, pen shaking with fear and excitement?

Seulgi’s hands itched to touch those pages. Without thinking, she pushed forward, ran the tip of her finger across a page. The paper was soft against her skin, but she was already distracted by the numbers. 

Seulgi liked numbers. Numbers made sense and numbers never lied unless you lied about them first. The numbers were a fixed point that gave her some illusion of control over her fate. 

She ran through the page twice, turning it carefully to look at some of the older pages, before her fingers finally stopped on a line, tapping it once, carefully.

“Here,” she said, looking up, searching for Joohyun, who she’d shamefully forgotten about. “Um, I think this is wrong. The price of lumber can’t be that low. The comma is in the wrong place.”

Joohyun walked over to look over her shoulder. Seulgi, who had sat down in Joohyun’s chair without thinking about it, found herself too aware of the line of her body, of the heat that Joohyun seemed to exude whenever Seulgi got too close.

“You’re absolutely right,” Joohyun said after a moment of staring at the page, and the smile that lit up her face was absolutely breathtaking. “You wouldn’t happen to know how much lamp oil we should order to keep us lit up for the next couple of months, would you?”

“Not at the top of my head,” Seulgi told her, smiling back almost helplessly. “But I think we can figure it out.”

She got up out of the chair even though Joohyun kept gesturing her back into it. The next hour or so was spent leaning over Joohyun’s shoulder, figuring out the supplies they needed to last the winter and into spring. 

Things changed for Seulgi after that. Johnny and Joohyun cleared out a space for her in Joohyun’s study, and a small desk was brought in, along with a chair and a small ornately carved abacus. Seulgi spent a few hours a day there, going through ledgers and puzzling out the budget for the estate as well as the surrounding villages that stood on land that belonged to Joohyun. The first time she realized how many there were and how much income they brought through tax revenue, she had to sit back and stare out into the backyard for a while. 

She really had married up, hadn’t she? The thought made her laugh, though there was a strangled hysteria to it.

“Is something wrong?” Joohyun asked from across the room, looking up from her books. 

Seulgi shook her head, still in disbelief. “Nothing,” she said, “I just didn’t realize how many villages you’re tasked with overseeing. It surprised me.”

“Oh,” Joohyun said thoughtfully, leaning back in her seat. “There are a few. The estate was empty for a while, and even before that, there wasn’t a lot of upkeep for a while. I’ve been trying to re-establish the relationships but it’s slow. There’s a lot to fix up in the villages and while they have fond memories of my parents, they aren’t sure about me yet.”

“Understandable,” Seulgi said, head still spinning. Joohyun smiled apologetically at her.

“It’s why I was absent so much in the fall,” she said gently. “I know it was hard to stay here alone.”

Seulgi flushed, trying to ignore the warm feeling spreading through her chest. “It’s alright,” she said, smiling, gratified when Joohyun smiled back. “I managed. You’ve all been very welcoming towards me.”

“I’m glad,” Joohyun said softly and something in her gaze was so intense that Seulgi had to drop her eyes to her lap and pretend she was working. Instead, she listened to the scratch of Joohyun’s quill on paper, to the soft rustle of her clothes, as she moved, the barely-there cadence of her breathing.

Seulgi still spent the majority of her time in the sitting room, but that had changed too. Now, Joohyun would actually join her after she was done with her paperwork, at first almost shyly sitting down in the armchair across from Seulgi with her own book. It was usually something more practical than what Seulgi chose herself, like military tactics or world history. 

Seulgi came into the sitting room one day to find a small table set up with chess pieces, Joohyun already looming over them. The pieces were exquisitely carved, the horses coiled just before movement, the bishops’ faces blank and devoted. The black pieces were set in mahogany, while the white pieces gleamed so brightly the must have been pure ivory, and that was already on top of the table inlaid with squares and polished hard enough to shine.

“Do you play?” Joohyun asked her, seeming to sense her regard.

“I’ve never learned,” Seulgi said carefully, half-convinced that the beautiful pieces would crumble under her fingers if she even tried to touch them.

“Alright,” Joohyun said, and smiled with a touch of mischief, “come sit down. I’ll teach you.”

Joohyun was a patient teacher and Seulgi got the basics of it quite quickly, but that didn’t mean she was good at it. Any game with Joohyun ended quickly, and oftentimes she felt like Joohyun was almost toying with her, making the wrong move deliberately so that the game went on longer. 

“Ah, I don’t think I’m really good at this,” Seulgi said, feeling huffy after losing the third time in a row on the same day. “I’m not really a challenge for you. You must be bored.”

“I’m not bored,” Joohyun told her, before smiling at her almost playfully. “Honestly? You’re actually doing very well for a beginner. I’m just very good.”

The pride in her voice made Seulgi smile. Being with Joohyun like this, it made it really easy to forget that the woman had one of the most celebrated tactical minds in the Empire and that she’d had succeeded where others wouldn’t, purely through rigorous planning and proper application of troops. And it was cute, how she got competitive over a simple game of chess with Seulgi.

“That’s alright then,” Seulgi said and agreed to another game, only to be frowning at the board half an hour later.

“Wait, something is off here,” she said to Joohyun, who seemed to be doing her best to look innocent. “Are you...letting me win?”

“I have no idea what you mean,” Joohyun said, grinning and Seulgi picked up her queen to wave it threateningly in her direction. “You know when you pick up a piece you’re supposed to move it.”

“I’ll move you!” Seulgi said threateningly and it made Joohyun laugh, a surprisingly deep throaty sound that echoed in the room and punched straight through Seulgi’s gut.

  
  


*

  
  


In the wake of all these changes, it was understandable that it took Seulgi a while to figure it out. She’d puzzled out most of the outgoing expenses by herself, and didn't want to ask Joohyun’s help unless it was something urgent. She didn’t need to know every expense the household produced, had in fact not known most of the things her father spent his money on. It didn’t mean she couldn’t run a good ledger.

It was just nice, is all. Nice to feel like there was something she could control. It wasn’t until that one line expense, repeated over a number of months, that she realized how illusory that control was.

The more she looked at it, the more something sick coiled at the tip of her stomach. She thought back to how in the fall she’d been convinced that Joohyun had a mistress somewhere, someone she went to see on all those riding trips, someone who gave her what she refused to take for Seulgi. It was enough money to rent a small apartment, with someone to cook and clean, enough to live comfortably if your tastes didn’t run too expensive.

But thinking of Joohyun now, about all the things she knew about her, how seriously she took her responsibilities, it didn’t fit anymore. And the only other thing Seulgi could think of -

“Are you paying my father’s living expenses?” Seulgi said, ice spreading through her chest cavity, her voice echoing hollowly off wood padded walls of the study. Joohyun looked up from her work, quill stuck halfway and probably bleeding all over her papers and the expression on her face told Seulgi the answer before she even opened her mouth.

“Yes,” she said.

“Why?” Seulgi asked, and it scraped raw over her throat on the way out.

“He was very kind to me when I started in the military,” Joohyun said quietly, her eyes serious. “He looked out for me.”

“That was then,” Seulgi said, aware that her voice was shaking, that her whole body was shaking. “And now you’re, what? Feeding his gambling habit? Shouldering his expenses? Taking his useless daughter off his hands? What does he have on you? Is he blackmailing you?”

“Seulgi, no -” Joohyun started but Seulgi was already shaking her head, stumbling shakily onto her feet. She grabbed at her dress (heavy velvet, warm enough for winter, a dress Joohyun had  _ paid _ for, putting her even further in her debt), turned around and ran.

She came back to herself, standing on the topmost floor of the estate. Through the window, the grounds stretched out before her like a painting, pristine in a thick layer of snow, and beyond them the snow-tipped trees grew as far as the eye could see, eventually sinking right into the steel-color of the sky.

She’d rarely been up here, the rooms covered in a layer of dust that rose up where she walked and tickled her nose. There was a nook with padded benches in front of the window and she folded herself on one of them, clutching her hands in the fabric of her dress.

Seulgi was stuck so deeply in her thoughts that she didn’t hear the tapping of the cane or the slightly uneven footsteps. She only really became aware of Joohyun’s presence when she cleared her throat and jolted her from her thoughts.

The air between them was tense in a way it hadn’t been before, even after their ill-fated wedding night. Seulgi turned her head away to look out into the winter day instead. She was cold. The sweat hadn’t dried and this part of the mansion wasn’t heated. 

“I thought you’d be happy that your father was taken care of,” Joohyun said and there was no recrimination in her voice but Seulgi heard it echo in her head anyway.

Before he was a gambler and a drunk, her father had been a successful military man. He never doted on his family, but she could faintly remember days where she’d sat at his feet, playing with her doll, listening to his voice sharply dictate missives to a secretary. That had been before he’d started spending his days at the horse races and his evening in increasingly seedier casinos. Seulgi’s mother fell ill and there wasn't enough money to ease her pain before she passed. Her father got honorably discharged because he was friendly with his superiors. By then, Seulgi was barely an afterthought, a child, who’d had both her childhood and her pride ripped away piece by agonizing piece.

“I hate my father,” she told Joohyun and it was the truth. “If he has to scrape by month by month, worried about how to keep a roof over his head and where his next meal is coming from, then that’s no concern of mine. I’ve been doing it for years.”

There was a beat of silence. 

“I’m sorry,” Joohyun said and she sounded so gentle, so sincere that it cut right through her chest. Seulgi stared out the window and blinked tears out of her eyes.

“What was the deal you made with him?” she made herself ask.

“He never told you?” Joohyun asked and Seulgi turned around to stare at her. “Of course he didn’t.”

“He told me to pack my things and be ready to get married in two weeks. When I tried to ask questions he laughed and told me I was lucky that someone wanted me at all.”

Joohyun’s face hardened into stone. “The deal was that you marry me and move here, and I pay for a year of his boarding. After that, he’s not to contact either of us ever again.”

Seulgi gaped at her. It sounded like a dream. It sounded too good to be true. “But...why?”

“It was the only way I could get him to agree to leave you alone,” Joohyun explained, looking apologetic. Seulgi shook her head.

“No,” she said, “I mean why go to all this trouble for me? You don’t even know me!”

Joohyun was quiet for a while and the only thing filling the silence were Seulgi’s harsh breaths. 

“Do you remember your father’s retirement party?” Joohyun asked finally. She must have read the confusion on Seulgi’s face because she continued. “It was just after I’d been promoted to First Lieutenant. I was so awkward in my new parade uniform and everyone was scrambling to salute me to my face just to gossip behind my back.”

“Your father insisted I stay by his side. He kept introducing me as his protege and it was uncomfortable. He introduced me to you,” a smile touched her face, something fragile and wistful. “I still remember what you were wearing. It was some long dress, red velvet, and all the fashion, your hair all done up in the latest style. You were beautiful. And you looked so sad.”

“It was right after my mother died,” Seulgi said softly, trying to remember the moment. “I don’t remember much from that day, except that I was furious that he was throwing a party after she’d barely been set to rest. “But that doesn’t answer my question.”

Joohyun looked puzzled. “What do you mean?”

“That can’t be it. You thought I was beautiful and sad, and what then? You decided to be some heroine and rescue me?” Seulgi shook her head in disbelief. 

“Yes,” Joohyun said, unbothered. She had that look on her face, the one Seulgi could never read. “I saw an opportunity to take you away from there and I took it.”

“It’s so much money,” Seulgi said softly, mortified at the tears that were welling up in her eyes, “it’s too much to waste on someone like me. You’ll need to let me make it up somehow. I can sew -”

Joohyun cut her off by leaning forward and taking her hand. It was almost shockingly warm on Seulgi’s cold fingers. She caught her gaze and held it, and spoke in a furious whisper that rang out like a shot. 

“There are no debts between us,” she said, holding onto Seulgi’s hand. “You’re here because I want you to be here and because I like your company, and anyone who says otherwise is a liar.”

“I want you to stay here with no obligation,” Joohyun continued, “for as long as you want. And if you ever want to leave,” she paused, seemingly fighting with herself for a moment, “if you ever want to leave, we’ll work something out between us. But never doubt your place here.”

Joohyun’s gaze was so warm and so sincere, and her words were so kind that Seulgi wanted to believe her. She squeezed her eyes shut against the tears gathering in them. In her chest, something began to thaw.

“Alright,” she whispered softly, “alright.”

“Alright,” Joohyun echoed her, face softened with a smile. “Now, could we get out of here? I’m afraid I’m going to freeze.”

It started a laugh out of Seulgi and she got up on slightly unsteady knees. Joohyun didn’t need the support, but Seulgi reached out anyway and heaved her to her feet, and then, because she wanted to, she looped her arm through Joohyun’s elbow and together they descended the stairs to where it was warm.

  
  


*

  
  


It was an unusually cold winter that year. Frost crept like spiderwebs over the windows and a nearby stream froze over, and the cold wind whistled through the rafters every night. Joohyun decided they’d only heat the kitchen, the servants quarters, the study and the bedroom, to conserve firewood, but it was still bitterly cold at night as the fire in the fireplace died down to embers.

Seulgi curled up on her side under the multiple blankets, trying not to shiver too noticeably. She peeked from under the duvet to squint at the fireplace. She had a few options. One was to roll carefully out of bed and put on a dressing gown, and just hope she wouldn’t freeze on her way to the fireplace, where she could stroke the few remaining coals into a fire, then wait for ages for the room to warm up.

Or, she could -

“Joohyun,” she whispered into the dark. “Joohyun, are you awake?”

There was a moment of quiet, then sheets rustling. “Yes,” Joohyun whispered back, her voice low and gravelly, but alert. Hadn’t been asleep either then.

“I’m cold,” Seulgi said softly, straining her eyes in the darkness for Joohyun’s silhouette. There were heavy velvet curtains drawn over the windows to keep out the cold and the light from the fireplace had long since died down.

The sheets rustled again and she could feel the mattress moving under her and Joohyun spoke. “I’ll put some wood on the fire, try to get it going -” 

Seulgi cut her off with a sharp “No!”, reaching blindly across the expanse of mattress between them until she found something warm. Joohyun’s arm. She moved her hands down, feeling over the heavy cotton pajamas until she found Joohyun’s fingers and folded them in her own.

“No,” she repeated, softer. “Just...come over here.”

“Seulgi,” Joohyun said softly, barely a breath in the quiet between them. “I don’t know…”

She trailed off and Seulgi rolled her eyes to herself, trying to ignore how hard her heart was pounding. “Come on,” she said, coaxing and tugged on their joined hands. After a moment, Joohyun let herself be moved. 

It took some fumbling and adjusting, but Seulgi ended up on her side, pressed up against Joohyun’s back, their intertwined hands on Joohyun’s stomach. Usually, she forgot she was a few centimeters taller than Joohyun, but like this, with Joohyun warm and pliant in her arms, all she could think about was how nice it was to be able to hold someone like this. Joohyun sighed softly, and Seulgi felt the way her chest moved, her belly moving their clasped hands. Every time she breathed in, Joohyun’s hair tickled her nose, and she buried her face in her nape to avoid it. It was the closest they’d ever been.

The cold receded, unable to touch their cocoon of blankets and body heat. Seulgi could feel the tension in Joohyun’s body unwind, and her own anxiety creep away with it. As Joohyun’s breath evened out in sleep, Seulgi closed her eyes and followed, falling into peaceful dreams for what felt like the first time in years.

  
  


*

Spring came and the household exhaled a sigh of relief. The ground thawed, snowdrops and primroses filling it in welcome patches of color. The stream bubbled back to life, filling the air with its quiet rumble. Donghyuck ventured out in the sparse sunlight, wearing an armful of knitted scarves, coaxing life back to the cold dirt.

It got warmer and the roses began sprouting red baby leaves from under their cover of pine needles, as the tulips fought their way outside into their own patch of the sun, making the gardens into a sea of color. 

Seulgi returned to her walks through the grounds, dressed warmly but relieved to turn her face towards the sun. Next to her footsteps, Joohyun’s cane made deep impressions in the muddy earth and Seulgi kept her hand looped through hers so that she wouldn’t stumble if the tip of the cane got stuck. 

March fell into April and farmers from surrounding villages came to help them plant the vegetable gardens in exchange for a meal and a few coins. Taeyong almost tore his hair out, scrambling to feed so many mouths from their admittedly meager provisions, but the roads had thawed enough that it allowed for more supplies to come through and then it didn’t much matter anymore.

Along with supplies, that also meant that letters started arriving at the estate again. Specifically, one midnight blue envelope sealed with the red seal of the royal family. Seulgi was in the garden with Donghyuck when it arrived, listening intently as he instructed her how to plant the potatoes into the ground.

It was there, kneeling in the dirt, getting her dress muddy and laughing at Donghyuck’s joke that Joohyun found her.

“For a whole month?” Seulgi asked incredulously. “Why would they need you to stay so long?”

Joohyun shook her head slightly, expression tight. “I don’t know,” she said, “but Her Majesty has her reasons. I leave tomorrow.”

“Right,” Seulgi said, straightening and doing her best to smile reassuringly while her stomach churned. “Of course. It must be important, otherwise, Her Majesty wouldn’t have called you in. You’ll need to pack and send a message to the stables to bring the horses. I’ll go tell Taeyong that he needs to prepare provisions.”

“Seulgi,” Joohyun said and there was a strange note in her voice, as she reached out to touch Seulgi’s arm. She seemed to hesitate when Seulgi turned to look at her. She looked tense. Distraught.

“What’s the matter?” Seulgi asked gently, suddenly concerned. Joohyun dropped her arm and shook her head, frowning.

“I hate to leave you all here alone,” Joohyun confessed in a rush, eyes dark with some unreadable emotion. “I’ll leave John here with you. Ask him for anything you need. The checkbook is at your disposal and the bank in town knows to give you free rein with the accounts.”

She looked so grave, so serious, that Seulgi felt something tighten painfully in her chest. “There isn’t going to be another war, is it?” she asked in a whisper.

“No,” Joohyun said, and smiled, reassuring. “Just a small rebellion in the East. I know the territory well and they’ve need of my expertise, nothing more. It won’t take more than a month.”

Seulgi couldn’t take it anymore. The knot of anxiety in her chest tightened too hard and she abruptly felt tears stinging her eyes, so she closed her eyes and stepped blindly forward, and took her in her arms. Joohyun’s form was warm and solid, unbendable, full of compact muscle and despite herself, Seulgi was reassured by it.

“No more than a month,” Joohyun said softly into her hair. “I promise.”

  
  


*

  
  


The whole household gathered to see Joohyun off the next day. The few soldiers on call that lived in the neighboring villages brought horses early in the morning, and the courtyard was alive with movement, the stomping of feet and hooves. 

John stood by Seulgi’s side, still as a statue, his young face schooled into sternness. Taeyong and Yerim were beside him, less stoic, eyes shining too bright in the morning light. They were holding back tears. Donghyuck, further down the line, didn’t even try. 

Seulgi felt them prickle in her eyes too, but she gave Joohyun her best reassuring smile when the older woman looked at her. 

“We’re going to be alright,” she promised her quietly, and Joohyun smiled back, just an upward tick of her mouth.

“I know you are,” she agreed and then reached out to take Seulgi’s hand in her gloved one. She pressed her mouth to the back of her knuckles and Seulgi was reminded of their first meeting, when she’d kissed her just like that. Things were so different now, though she couldn’t quite articulate how.

Joohyun let go of her hand and stepped back. Despite her knee, she swung effortlessly on top of her horse, settling firmly into her saddle. Seulgi handed over her cane and she thanked her softly.

Then, with a firm goodbye and a sharper command, she spurred her horse and rode away, the soldiers filing in formation behind her. Seulgi watched them go until the last silhouette dipped under the horizon.

  
  


*

  
  


The first few days without Joohyun were torturous.

Seulgi tossed and turned through the night. She was too cold, the bed was too empty, the room was quiet without Joohyun’s even breathing beside her. She woke up in the morning from fitful, restless sleep and was burdened by heavy exhaustion during the day.

It didn’t help that in the first three days it rained. The kind of constant miserable rain that chilled you to the bone even if you stayed inside, and all Seulgi could think about was Joohyun riding in it, enduring the cold and damp, leg and body aching.

She and John poured over the paperwork during the day, and it felt like they were barely muddling through it. He seemed to sense her frustration and became quieter, anxious. She hated herself for it, but couldn’t seem to stop. Both Donghyuck and Yerim were too-loud after being stuck inside for hours, and Taeyong shrunk quietly behind his pots and refused to sit down for dinner.

It was miserable and upsetting, and by the time the fourth day came, Seulgi had had enough.

The day dawned bright and clean, water droplets clinging to flower petals slowly evaporating under the spring sunshine. It was the kind of morning that felt washed clean, like an empty slate, or a new beginning.

It was in that kind of mood that she entered the sitting room, took a look around, at the dusting painting frames, at the ugly furniture, at the dollies scattered over it, rusting with age, and the gorgeous chess set it surrounded, now gathering dust. 

Something inside her snapped.

She pulled the dollies off the mantelpiece with an angry tug and threw them into the corner of the room. She picked the pictures off the walls and carried them out into the hallway. And then she went to the ugly uncomfortable sofa, the very same that she’d sat upon when she first came to this estate and started pulling it out of the room.

Yerim arrived, probably attracted by the noise and her eyes widened.

“What...what are you doing?” she asked, staring at Seulgi, disheveled and sweaty. 

“We’re doing some spring cleaning,” Seulgi said resolutely. “Now help me roll up these rugs. And then go get John. We’re doing some redecorating.”

Still wide-eyed, Yerim at least knelt down and helped her with the rugs and then ran off to find John, who arrived, breathless, just as Seulgi dragged a side table out the door and threw it into one of the corners.

“Ma’am,” he said, “what is going on here?”

“We’re redecorating,” Seulgi said, breathing heavily and standing with her hands on her hips in the middle of the half-dismantled living room. “We’ll need to call plasterers from the town. I also want someone to come in and look at the roof, see if there’s anything we can do about the leaks without replacing the whole thing. We’ll need some more people to move furniture.”

“Alright,” John said slowly. “How many rooms are we going to be working on exactly?”

“This sitting room,” Seulgi said firmly, “the study, and the smaller dining room. Someone should come to look at Taeyong’s stove, I think it needs to be cleaned at the least. The staff quarters need new mattresses. The bedroom, and some of the smaller guest bedrooms.”

“So, the whole first floor,” John said, watching her with a glint in his eyes, “and half of the second. How soon do you expect this to be done, ma’am?”

“A month,” Seulgi said, starting to smile at John’s incredulous expression. “We can do it.”

“A month,” John repeated faintly. Then: “Alright. We can make it happen.”

Seulgi beamed at him.

The windows were thrown open, letting in the warm spring sunshine that finally began to dry the damp that had seemed to settle in the walls of the old mansion. The furniture was carried out into the hallways, the rooms emptied as the plasterers came in to paint on a fresh coat of plaster. There were workers on the roof, doing their best to move and replace tiles to cover up the worst of the leaks. 

The days were alive with noise and movement, as Seulgi bustled from one room to the next, directing people and assisting with the moving, sometimes going down to her knees to help clean the newly uncovered floorboards, or standing out in the sun to rub new life into old furniture. In the evenings she worked on paperwork late into the night, making sure that their orders were placed on time, that they had enough supplies, that there was correspondence with the villages under their care. She fell into bed exhausted to the bone and slept like the dead, not waking up until morning. And when anxiety crept in, there was always more work to do.

The staff was exhausted too, but each of them stepped up to their tasks admirably. Taeyong cooked up a storm every day and Donghyuck gleefully cut down ivy where it had crept into the building’s brick and mortar. John and Yerim ran themselves ragged, directing the workers and cleaning after them, and they collapsed next to Seulgi on the hardwood floors in the evening when the house emptied out, only moving when Donghyuck brought them a tray with tea and sandwiches.

None of them ever complained of the sudden workload, the furious way that Seulgi had thrown herself into it, and she loved them for it, their little household. Loved them more every time she poured over bank statements and missives with John, or ate Taeyong’s freshly baked bread, or laughed as Yerim chased Donghyuck among newly hung sheets fluttering in the breeze.

She loved them, she kept busy, but something was missing. Joohyun’s letters were few and far between, short messages on paper always strained by mud or damp, and Seulgi’s heart ached to have her home, walking through the restored rooms, or warm and safe in their bed.

A month went around and there were no messages, no indications of Joohyun’s return. The household was jittery all morning, John snapping at Donghyuck and immediately looking guilty about it, Yerim dropping a cup from the second-best china set, Taeyong burning the scones, and Seulgi throwing herself into tasks with such frantic energy that she was barely standing on her feet.

It wasn’t until late afternoon that the distant sound of horse hooves echoed through the mansion. It wasn’t the sound of the farmhands they hired, with their heavy and slow workhorses and oxen, but instead the elegant and thunderous gait of the chargers, horses favored by the military.

Seulgi knew what that meant even before John flew in, out of breath and beaming, to yell, “She’s here!” And then she was running, out of the foyer and down the front steps, stopping at the foot of them just in time to see the banner appear on the horizon. The approaching party was bigger than the one that departed a month earlier, and dressed in full military regalia, the silver accents on their uniforms catching the light of the sinking sun.

And in front, on top of her tall dappled destrier rode Joohyun. 

She was magnificent in the fading light, the pinks and oranges of the sunset painting golden against her skin. She drew closer, and Seulgi could see her eyes, dark and fathomless, the smile that barely softened the corners of her mouth, the dark strands of hair escaping from her tight bun. 

Seulgi had a moment where she was aware of her own disheveled state, at the rips and mud on her dress, at how sweaty she was, with tangled hair. Nothing at all like how the lady of the house should be looking as she greeted her returning wife.

But then Joohyun’s horse spurred into a canter, eliminating the last few meters between them, the horse coming to a sudden stop as Joohyun was already dismounting and Seulgi unfroze enough to run forward to help her down. 

Joohyun hit the ground heavy and Seulgi threw her arms around her as she wobbled, steadying her and they looked at each other and Joohyun was smiling. She was slight and strong and perfect in her arms, smelling like horsehair and sweat, and Seulgi wanted to kiss her.

They stared at each other for a moment, stunned silent and then Joohyun grasped Seulgi’s hand, and pressed her knuckles to her mouth, butterfly soft.

“My lady Seulgi,” she said and Seulgi’s heart threatened to beat right out of her chest.

“Joohyun,” Seulgi whispered, robbed of thought, “you’re back.”

“I promised you a month and not a day longer,” Joohyun said, smiling softly. Seulgi, who abruptly became aware of how close they were, dropped her arms and reached over to take the cane off the horse, handing it over to Joohyun who took it with a quiet thanks.

There was an awkward moment of silence, as Seulgi searched for something to say. Finally, the other horses reached them, and Joohyun turned around to wave them closer and released from her eyes, Seulgi finally felt like she could take a breath.

“We have a guest, who’ll be staying with us for a while,” Joohyun said, guiding her horse a few paces forward to reveal a boy sitting on a horse. He was thin and wide-eyed, his right hand wrapped up in a cast, the other awkwardly gripping the reigns. “Seulgi, this is-”

“Mark!” Donghyuck, emerging from among the blooming lilac bushes, his young face going from shock to an expression of such pure unfiltered happiness that it was hard to look at. He rushed forward to the other boy, practically lifting him off the horse and crushing him into his arms. Their mirrored expressions of wonder and joy made something warm unfold in Seulgi’s chest and she looked towards Joohyun, whose smile widened at the sight of Seulgi’s.

“Mark, Donghyuck’s fiance,” Joohyun finished. “He hurt his hand and I thought the best thing would be that he recuperates somewhere where he’d be cared for, especially since it’s only a month left until his discharge.”

“You did a good thing,” Seulgi said, softly, reaching to squeeze her hand once before turning towards John and Yerim, standing at the foot of the stairs, beaming smiles on their faces. She gave them a few quick instructions about settling the soldiers into the few newly cleaned rooms and the horses into the mostly empty stables. Luckily there were a few farmhands still left on the property to look after the horses since it seemed like Donghyuck wouldn’t have eyes for anyone but Mark at least for a while.

“Things have changed while I was gone,” Joohyun said to her, after, but she didn’t sound upset, so Seulgi smiled. 

“A little,” she said, then, daringly, reached out to touch Joohyun’s arm, linking their elbows as she guided her up the stairs.

Joohyun’s eyes went wide when they entered the foyer. Seulgi smiled proudly at the swept and mopped floors, at the walls still gleaming with new plaster, at the picture frames cleared of dust. The fading sunlight was rapidly turning into twilight, so she dropped Joohyun’s arm to light up an oil lamp.

She almost dropped it when she turned around, because Joohyun was standing right behind her, dark eyes gleaming liquid in the firelight. 

“Seulgi, this is beautiful,” she said lowly, reaching out to retake her hand, entwining their fingers.

“You haven’t seen anything yet,” Seulgi told her, the feelings in her chest bursting into elation. She tugged on Joohyun’s hand to get her to follow. Next was the study, where Seulgi’s previous desk had been replaced by another set, in darker wood, the shelves rearranged so that the desk fit more naturally. Both were polished until they gleamed, reflecting the soft firelight.

“It won’t be long until I ruin this with my papers and ink,” Joohyun murmured, running her hand reverently over the wood of the desk.

The sitting room was the one with the most drastic change, and Seulgi hurried a little to step in before Joohyun did, just to watch her reaction. The furniture had been changed to warmer, brighter colors, the paintings were changed from portraits of stern ancestors to sweeping landscapes, and the uncomfortable sofa was gone.

Joohyun stopped by one of the armchairs that had replaced the sofa, touching her fingers to the new fabric covering it.

“I got them reupholstered,” Seulgi said, hesitantly “and I found some similar fabric to what they had on originally. I thought they’d be more comfortable.”

Joohyun made a soft sound under her breath. “You know,” she said softly, “these were my mother’s favorite armchairs. My father put them in storage after she died. Where did you even find them?”

“In one of the upstairs bedrooms, I…” Seulgi trailed off, then took a deep breath, feeling mortified. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize. I can get them removed first thing in the morning-”

“Seulgi,” Joohyun cut her off firmly. “I’m glad you brought them out. She would have liked that.”

She took a half step forward and sunk into the chair, settling her cane by her feet and closing her eyes. After a moment, she seemed to let out a huge breath of air, the tension in her form slowly unwinding. “They’re a bit smaller than what I remember them being. But then again, the last time I sat in one was when I was a child.”

“You couldn’t have grown much since then,” Seulgi said without thinking and Joohyun laughed, one of her deep booming laughs that echoed warmly in Seulgi’s ribcage. She couldn’t help smiling.

“I’ll leave you to unwind,” Seulgi said gently, “and maybe you’d like to change out of your riding outfit for dinner? I’ll go check on things.”

Joohyun didn’t argue, she just offered her another smile. As Seulgi passed her, she briefly pressed her hand over Joohyun’s where it was resting on the armrest. Joohyun turned her hand and tangled their fingers for a gentle squeeze before Seulgi moved on, out the door and to the dining room, a spring in her step.

  
  


*

  
  


Dinner was loud.

Yerim and Donghyuck chattered over each other, Donghyuck turning around every few minutes to feed an overwhelmed and furiously blushing Mark some food off his fork. Taeyong had half a glass of wine and giggled loudly at their antics, leaning closer and closer towards John, who looked both pleased and slightly panicked. Seulgi only interjected every so often to prompt them onto the correct train of thought or to reprimand their language.

And then there was Joohyun, a little quiet but not uninvolved. She was looking at all of them with a look of such undisguised fondness that Seulgi had a hard time not smiling.

Somewhere between the second main course and the cake that Taeyong brought out as a surprise, Seulgi put her hand on the table near her fork. And Joohyun reached out and covered it with her own.

Her fingers were cool and dry, and Seulgi had to take a deep gulp of her wine before she was brave enough to lace their fingers together. Yerim caught her eyes across the table and grinned. 

They held hands through dinner. Joohyun didn’t seem to notice but Seulgi couldn’t look away from how perfectly their fingers interlaced, Joohyun’s sword calluses rubbing against Seulgi’s softer skin. 

She thought about it all the way up the stairs, all the way to the door of the bedroom, clutching her hand in her skirts so she wouldn’t be tempted to reach out for Joohyun’s hand again. Heat gathered like a smoldering fire at the pit of her stomach and her cheeks felt hot. 

It wasn’t until she was watching Joohyun going through the beginning of her evening routine, picking up the pajamas laid out for her, that she finally found the will to speak.

“Joohyun,” Seulgi said, sitting down on the bed so that her suddenly weak knees wouldn’t betray her.

“Hm?” Joohyun said, turning around with her pajamas in her hands. Her blouse was untucked and halfway unbuttoned and Seulgi’s mouth went dry.

“Can we talk?” Seulgi said, twisting her hands in her lap. Joohyun’s face creased into a frown before smoothing out into something harder to read. Seulgi thought she looked nervous, but she couldn’t say for sure.

“Of course,” Joohyun said, dropping her pajamas and coming to sit next to Seulgi on the bed. She seemed to carefully put some distance between them and Seulgi swallowed down her disappointment. “What did you want to talk about?”

She was looking at her with her full attention, dark-eyed gaze filled with a strange intensity that robbed Seulgi of words. She swallowed a few times, trying to force out words that wouldn’t come. After a moment, Joohyun’s expression seemed to fall.

“Seulgi, if you…” Joohyun seemed to trail off, then rally herself up again to finish the sentence, “if there was another bedroom you wanted to move to, now that a couple of them are so wonderfully restored you could -”

“No!” Seulgi cut her off, shocked out of her nerves. Her heart beat harshly in her chest. “Do you want me to go?”

“No,” Joohyun shook her head sharply. Her indifferent mask seemed to crumble before Seulgi’s eyes and she just looked a little sad. Vulnerable. “But if you wanted to, you could. I shouldn’t have put you in here in the first place. You deserve your privacy.”

She looked away and down at the hands laced in her lap, nothing less than the picture of contrition. Seulgi took a deep breath and pushed her doubt away, trying to remember what Joohyun’s face had looked like as she rode up to the mansion, how her hand had stayed on Seulgi’s through dinner. 

“On our wedding night, you told me you weren’t attracted to me,” she said, and Joohyun’s head whipped up so quick that her neck must have hurt.

“I never said that,” she said.

Seulgi frowned. “Yes, you did,” she said, “on our wedding night, right on this bed.”

Joohyun shook her head slowly, letting out a small strangled laugh. “I said I wouldn’t force my attentions on you,” she said, “not that I wasn’t attracted to you in every way a woman should be attracted to her wife.”

“Oh,” Seulgi breathed. Joohyun wasn’t looking at her, staring instead at her own laced fingers, but her face was flushed pink, the color trailing all the way down to her collarbones and disappearing under her neckline. 

Suddenly emboldened by her heart beating a drum in her chest, Seulgi slowly slid closer to Joohyun on the bed. Joohyun seemed lost in her own thoughts, so she didn’t notice when Seulgi reached out to put a finger under her chin, tipping her head back so their eyes met.

“Joohyun,” Seulgi said softly, “are you still attracted to me?”

“I- ” Joohyun said, but cut herself off, seeming to catch onto the expression of Seulgi’s face. 

Seulgi had always lamented being an open book, but this time the smile that lit up Joohyun’s face made every previous embarrassment worth it. Seulgi still had her hands on her jaw, so it was easy to use the touch to bring Joohyun’s face a little bit closer, gathering the last of her courage to clumsily press their lips together.

Joohyun froze for a moment under the soft touch and right before Seulgi was about to pull away, embarrassed, she softened. Joohyun’s hand came up to cup her face, the other sliding through her hair, fingers combing through the strands. The sensations were almost overwhelming, small sparks of pleasure from her scalp combining with the soft press of Joohyun’s slightly chapped lips against her own, and Seulgi felt like she was melting, overheated, just from this. Joohyun’s mouth pressed more insistently against hers, slick and wet, and Seulgi let out an involuntary sound, high and shivery.

Joohyun pulled away slightly, giving Seulgi some time to catch her breath. She hadn’t even been aware she’s been holding it. She opened her eyes to see Joohyun, eyes wide and dark, mouth bitten red, the expression on her face nothing short of awed.

“Seulgi,” she whispered, sounding reverent, “Seulgi, you’ve been driving me out of my mind.”

Seulgi threw her arms around her neck, as Joohyun traced gentle fingers over her cheek. Joohyun made a sound under her breath, and pressed in, peppering soft kisses to Seulgi’s cheeks, to her nose, to her brow, to the corners of her mouth and the underside of her jaw. It tickled and Seulgi had to laugh, feeling nothing less than deliriously happy, which made Joohyun smile too.

Joohyun pressed in again and their kisses landed slightly off-center because they were both smiling too much to really fit their mouths together. There was something about being with Joohyun like this, her hands gentle on her cheek, that made her feel safe and protected. With Joohyun looking at her like Seulgi had given her a gift, she felt, maybe for the first time, like she belonged somewhere, and it was right in this room, the view of roses through the windows, the duvet of their bed soft beneath them.

When Joohyun looked at her like that, Seulgi forgot about how little she felt she had to give, forgot to worry about not being enough for this strong, brilliant woman who’d taken her in and given her a home. She closed her eyes and let herself be kissed until she forgot about her worries, and about everything else too.

  
  


*

  
  


It’d been raining all afternoon, the new growth of the season turning blurred through the fallen raindrops and the house filling up with the drum of them against the windows. The roof still wasn’t entirely fixed and the steady drip of rainwater through the displaced tiles had Seulgi worried, and the restless energy in her limbs had her pacing the upper levels of the house, looking for some kind of distraction.

She could admit to herself that her preoccupation had little to do with the weather. Joohyun had ridden out that morning, early enough that when Seulgi rolled over in their bed, the sheets on her side were long cold. It wasn’t on a long trip, just to a nearby village for a meeting with the local authorities but Joohyun hadn’t called for a carriage and a driver, opting to make the ride alone with her horse. No doubt she’d been caught in the downpour. She’d probably stay in the village for the evening, continuing home in the morning once the skies cleared up or the carriage could be sent for her.

The thought of it made Seulgi feel strange. Agitated. She managed to convince herself that Joohyun staying out of the rain was for the best, only to get caught up in a thought and emerge on the end of it feeling lonely and wretched and guilty for wishing she’d return anyway. It left her standing at various windows, squinting angrily out at the gloom.

She was staring out into the courtyard when her musings were interrupted by movement. Donghyuck was hurrying across it in a raincoat, a splash of color against the washed cobblestones. He ran to the gate and unlatched it. A figure rode in, protected from the rain and wind by a coat, the familiar horse striding confidently up to the doors. Seulgi gasped and hurried down the staircase, calling for Yerim.

She found her in the kitchen, polishing some of the silverware, and Yerim looked almost relieved to be taken away from the monotonous task. 

“Joohyun has returned,” Seulgi told her. “Could you run a bath in the upper bathroom? And, Taeyong, some tea wouldn’t go amiss.” 

She barely waited for them to nod, sweeping down the corridor towards the hall where the squeaking hinges announced the arrival of the lady of the house. Seulgi paused as she entered the hall, smoothing down her skirts before clearing her throat.

“I’d just had those floors waxed and now you’re dripping all over them,” she said. Joohyun turned around to look at her from where she’d been conversing with John. She was soaked through, hair turned darker from the water, halfway out of her strict bun. There were droplets clinging to her eyelashes, running down her cheeks. It made Seulgi want to kiss them away, and she flushed a little at the thought.

“Apologies,” Joohyun replied after a moment of silence. “Next time I’ll order better weather.”

“You shouldn’t have gone riding in this,” Seulgi scolded, stepping closer. “I thought you were staying in the village for the night.”

“I wanted to be home,” Joohyun said simply, her eyes intent on Seulgi. She’d stopped wringing the water out of her blouse and was just standing there, shaking slightly from the cold. After a moment of indecision, Seulgi shrugged off her overcoat and reached out to wrap it around Joohyun’s frame. Gooseflesh rose up on Seulgi’s bare shoulders, as much from the cold as from the way Joohyun traced them with her eyes.

Yerim cleared her throat somewhere behind them. Seulgi turned around and picked up the cup of tea off her tray, offering a nod when she was told that the bath was ready. She passed the cup to Joohyun, their hands briefly overlapping on the mug, Joohyun’s fingers ice cold.

“You’re freezing,” Seulgi said, softly, barely restraining herself from grabbing at them. “We should get you warmed up.” She gestured towards the stairs and with an unreadable look, Joohyun headed up to the bathroom, fingers still clutched around her cup, the other hand leaning against her cane.

Seulgi watched her go until she disappeared around a corner. And then she stepped forward to cut off Yerim, who was passing by, her hands full of towels and soap and various other bathing items. 

“I’ll take these upstairs,” Seulgi said, and Yerim’s eyes widened before she grinned.

“Are you certain?” Yerim started to say, but Seulgi cut her off with a reproachful look, too embarrassed to be kind, though Yerim seemed anything but cowed. She handed over the items without another word and Seulgi hurried up the stairs, too aware that her face was burning.

She trekked up the stairs, her hands full. It was only a few steps until she ended up regretting sending the maid away. The pile of towels was heavy and cumbersome, and she couldn’t see her own feet, almost tripping a couple of times at the uneven steps of the staircase.

Finally, she arrived at the doors of the bathroom and she had to take a moment to lean her head against the door, taking a deep breath. She listened for any signs of movement on the other side of the varnished wooden door, but there weren’t any. It felt awfully awkward to walk in on Joohyun changing, despite the fact that they’d been sharing a bed for months now, and had been kissing for weeks.

Seulgi waited for what she deemed was an appropriate amount of time for Joohyun to get changed and climb into the tub and then she knocked on the door, carefully juggling her armful of towels as she stepped inside.

She’d timed it right - Johhyun was already in the bathtub. Her long dark hair was free from her bun, cascading down her shoulders and trailing into the water, strands plastered wetly to her forehead and shoulders. She was immersed in the water, which swirled around her as she breathed, milky with bath salts, obscuring anything below the very tops of her breasts. Her eyes were closed, her head tilted back. She was exquisite.

Seulgi bit down on a gasp, setting down her burden with a clatter that Yerim never would have permitted herself. 

Joohyun didn’t even startle. “You can just leave those where I can reach them,” she said, without opening her eyes. “I can wash myself.”

“What if I want to help?” Seulgi said.

Joohyun’s eyes flew open, widening in surprise when she saw Seulgi in the room. The surprise only lasted for a moment before her features smoothed out an indecipherable expression. She still sounded hesitant when she spoke.

“I-” Joohyun started. “You don’t have to.”

“I want to,” Seulgi repeated. Joohyun stared at her for a moment, and then something in her seemed to relax.

“Alright,” she said, and Seulgi forced her frozen limbs to move, picking up the soap and a washcloth from her supplies. The bathtub was made of shined copper, the condensation already gathering up the sides. Seulgi knelt at its head in a slightly awkward motion and the muted gasp Joohyun let out was probably because of the surprise.

Seulgi reached out, gathering the strands of hair together to lay them across Joohyun’s back. She put her thumb on the junction between Joohyun’s shoulder and neck. The skin was soft under her hands, and she pressed gently. “Dip,” she said.

Obediently, Joohyun slid down to put her head under the water. It made her legs slide up higher, the tips of her small toes peeking from the bathwater. Seulgi held her breath and counted the seconds it took for Joohyun to come up, breaching the water with a soft gasp.

Water ran in rivets down Joohyun’s cheeks, dripping back into the bath, and her hair became almost a live thing, bigger and heavier as it gathered moisture. Seulgi dipped her trembling hands into the water, wetting the soap, trying to keep from touching Joohyun’s skin in the close quarters. 

They’d been kissing for a while now, spent most nights wrapped around each other, enough that Seulgi felt like she could barely remember what it felt like to fall asleep without Joohyun’s body curled up behind her, without her mouth, pressed softly to the back of Seulgi’s neck. But they hadn’t done anything else. Joohyun’s hands barely strayed to below Seulgi’s waist and Seulgi struggled with asking her for more than that, because what if Joohyun didn’t want it?

She ran her soapy hands through Joohyun’s hair, combing through the strands, following them up to her scalp where she pressed carefully. Joohyun’s head fell backward and she made a noise that had heat pooling in the base of Seulgi’s stomach.

Once Seulgi was certain that she’d touched every hair on her head, she put her hand on Joohyun’s shoulder. The air between them felt charged but fragile somehow, and she worried that she’d break it, reminding Joohyun of what she was doing. Worried that it would make her pull away.

She pressed down on Joohyun’s shoulder, and Joohyun followed the motion, dipping under the water, absolutely trusting, and Seulgi felt a thrill of power from it, from this strong, brilliant woman trusting her enough to be led. It gave her the courage to speak, once Joohyun had surfaced, her eyes drawn to the way the water droplets slid down the skin on her neck.

“Lean forward,” she whispered, and Joohyun did without a moment of hesitation, sitting up in the bath and exposing the strong expanse of her back to Seulgi’s air and the cool air. Seulgi had to stop and stare for a moment, at the smooth skin, the small scattering of moles on the top of her spine, the starburst scar on the left shoulder blade. She stared long enough that Joohyun started to shiver, which made her spring into action, grabbing at a washcloth and soaking it, to run it over the expanse of Joohyun’s back to the base of her spine. It was a little like magic, watching the tension in her posture unwind as she slumped, folded almost in half, boneless under Seulgi’s hands.

Seulgi set aside the washcloth and cupped some water in her hands to spill it over Joohyun’s shoulders, watching in fascination as it made paths in the soap suds on its way down. She repeated the process until there wasn’t any soap left, and then gave into temptation, trailing the path of a water droplet with her fingers to the base of Joohyun’s spine where her body disappeared into the water.

Joohyun let out a sound, loud and raspy, almost pained, and Seulgi snatched her hands away, concerned. Joohyun was shaking, slight tremors wracking her frame, sloshing the water in the tub.

“You must be cold,” Seulgi whispered, “I’m sorry. Lean back into the water, it’ll warm you up.”

With a sigh, Joohyun eased back, unfolding from her crouch. Seulgi touched her hair, gathering it to move it out of the way and Joohyun exhaled sharply. “Seulgi…” she said, her voice unsteady and Seulgi made a shushing noise under her breath, running a soothing hand over her shoulder.

She rose up from the floor, where she’d sunk to get better access to Joohyun’s body and gathered the soap and washcloth to pass to the other end of the tub. She kept her eyes on her feet, suddenly shy, aware of the almost tangible presence of Joohyun’s eyes on her.

When she sank to her knees at the foot of the tub, Joohyun let out an audible gasp, which made Seulgi look at her. Joohyun looked wrecked, eyes dark and mouth bitten red, the flush on her cheeks extending down to her chest, the tops of her breasts peeking out of the water. 

Seulgi stared because Joohyun looked glorious, she looked ethereal, like some sort of water spirit floating in the bathwater, droplets running down her cheeks, clinging to her eyelashes. Seulgi’s hands shook as she dipped them below the water and grasped Joohyun’s ankle, lifting it.

She ran the washcloth over Joohyun’s sole, over the calluses of a lifetime of working on her feet, and then upwards, touching over her ankle, pressing gently to rid of the tension that Joohyun always carried there. Joohyun’s hands came up out of the water to squeeze around the rim of the bathtub, white-knuckled.

Seulgi moved her hands up her leg, stopping when she reached Joohyun’s knee. The scar contrasted pale against the skin of her leg, and not for the first time Seulgi thought about the pain it must have caused, the pain that still haunted Joohyun’s steps, and she ached with it. She looked up, meeting Joohyun’s gaze head-on and then deliberately leaned forward to press her mouth over the scar.

The noise Joohyun let out was a gasp.

Joohyun’s leg dropped out of her grasp when she moved, but Seulgi was too distracted watching the way Joohyun leaned forward, rising out of the water. Her breasts were perfect and soft looking, with dusky brown nipples, and they rose with every heavy breath out of her lungs. She couldn’t look away.

“Seulgi,” Joohyun all but sobbed, and Seulgi finally tore her eyes away from her chest to look at her. “Get in here. Please. I need to touch you.”

Seulgi shot to her feet on slightly wobbly knees, and the urgency in Joohyun’s tone had her tearing at her laces, slipping the dress, which was already wet and clinging, over her head and throwing it somewhere in the corner. She stumbled over her petticoats, kicking them onto the floor before she stepped carefully into the water. 

Joohyun’s hands came up to steady her hips as she carefully kneeled astride her. At the first touch of bare skin on bare skin, they both moaned, and Joohyun hauled her closer to kiss her. The water around them was rapidly cooling but Joohyun felt hot against her, her hands leaving trails of heat on Seulgi’s body where they touched. It was all Seulgi could do to brace with her hands on the rim of the tub, bracketing Joohyun, holding on because it felt like the water and Joohyun’s touch might sweep her away.

Joohyun broke the kiss but didn’t go far, breathing against Seulgi’s mouth, her warm breath an anchor. “You’re unbelievable,” she said, nothing less than reverence in her voice. Seulgi whimpered.

“Please,” she whispered, not even sure exactly what she was asking for.

“What do you want?” Joohyun asked her softly. “I’ll give you everything.”

“Touch me,” Seulgi managed to gasp out before Joohyun was kissing her again and she seemed to know exactly what to do, her hand coming to grasp Seulgi’s bottom and hauling her closer, towards her warmth, towards delicious friction. 

The water sloshed over the edge of the bathtub, pooling on the floor, but Seulgi couldn’t think about anything that wasn’t Joohyun in her arms, the press of her mouth, the gentle rocking motion of their bodies, the heat and pressure that built between them until it washed over her like a wave, leaving her shaking and overwhelmed and satisfied.

  
  


*

  
  


Spring dripped slowly into summer, the days growing longer and warmer. It hardly deterred Seulgi from pressing herself around Joohyun’s body in the evenings, or from exploring the newly discovered physical side of their relationship. Joohyun certainly never complained.

There was a certain heady feeling in having Joohyun’s attention on her openly. Her expressions were no longer so indecipherable now that she knew what Joohyun looked like when she was in love and the weight of her reverent gaze made Seulgi stand up straighter and walk with a spring in her step. 

“You’d think you were a pair of newlyweds,” Yerim told her, grinning mischievously. “You’ve been married for months.”

Seulgi shushed at her, throwing a spiderwebbed doily at her when she wasn’t looking, but privately she thought the same. She wanted to be kissing Joohyun all the time, wanted to be holding her hand and sitting in her lap, wanted to wrap her body around hers and let the responsibilities pass them by. 

She’d never do that though. Both she and Joohyun were busy with their responsibilities and for the most part, Seulgi liked that, liked being useful. It was only in the evenings, when she sat herself down on Joohyun's lap and kissed her, or in their bed, that she let herself indulge.

It was between those armchair kisses that Joohyun dropped some news.

"My friend Sooyoung wrote me a letter," she said in between pressing heated kisses to Seulgi's throat. "You remember her?"

"Mm," Seulgi was having a hard time remembering anything that wasn't Jooyhun's kisses at that moment and she thought Joohyun knew that. "Your lieutenant."

"That's right," Joohyun said, smiling against her pulse, "she's expressed an interest in visiting us if that's amenable."

"Oh," Seulgi stiffened and pulled away, Joohyun following her. She pressed the tip of her finger against her nose to stop her in place and Joohyun smiled at her playfully. "You know I can't think when you do that. When is she coming?"

"In three weeks, if I send her the invitation tomorrow," Joohyun said, obediently settling back into the chair, watching Seulgi.

"I think one of the bigger guest rooms should be done by then," she said. "The one on the second floor that faces west? The bathroom is due to be refitted in the next week and the new walnut furniture set should be here soon as well. Would that be okay?"

"Sooyoung would have been alright with the smaller guest rooms too," Joohyun shrugged, "she's not very fussy. But that sounds perfect."

"Another of you military types," Seulgi murmured teasingly, reaching out to comb through Joohyun's hair, "no regard for creature comforts."

Joohyun snorted. "Oh, I have plenty of regard for comforts," she said, "and a pretty wife that's taught me to indulge them."

Seulgi laughed. "Ah, really?" she said. "Then maybe we should move this to the bedroom. A bed seems just like the creature comfort to indulge in right now."

"Is that the only comfort for tonight?" Joohyun asked, smiling widely enough that Seulgi had to lean in to kiss it off her face.

"We'll see," Seulgi said, a promise, and it wasn't long till the two of them were sneaking up the stairs, giggling quietly as to not alert Yerim that they were still awake.

That was then. Now, three weeks later, those thoughts couldn't be further from Seulgi's mind. She'd been driving both herself and the staff a little insane for the past couple of days, fussing over the guest room, and then over the rest of the house, making sure the floors were polished, and the furniture shined and the windows cleaned to let in the warm summer sunshine.

She was nervous about the visit. Exceedingly so.

For all intents and purposes, Sooyoung was Joohyun's closest friend. The two had met in the military barracks and had risen up the ranks together. They'd trained together, fought together and slept together, and Seulgi suspected that the latter was more than just the literal meaning of the word. She was too shy to ask Joohyun about it though, so it remained a mystery. That wasn't the part she was worried about though. She didn't doubt Joohyun's devotion to her.

Mostly, she was just worried that Sooyoung wouldn't like her. She was worried about making a bad impression, about Joohyun's friend thinking that Joohyun had made a poor decision in taking Seulgi as a wife. Sooyoung hadn't been present at their wedding after all, and although Joohyun had assured her it was simply because Sooyoung had been caught up in other duties, Seulgi couldn't help but wonder.

She didn't want to be someone that drew a wedge between Joohyun and her friends. And she didn't want her to feel ashamed.

Hence, the fussing.

"You know, Sooyoung won't care about how fresh the flowers in the vase on her bedside table are," Joohyun told her, looking amused as Seulgi rearranged the flowers for the umpteenth time.

"Does she not like flowers?" Seulgi asked, eyes widening. "Why didn't you tell me? I'll throw them out right now."

"No, no," Joohyun stopped her by slinging her arms around her waist, hands covering hers on the vase. "She'll love the flowers. And she'll love you too."

"How can you be so sure?" Seulgi muttered but let herself be drawn into Joohyun's embrace, her fears soothed if only for a little while.

They were back full force the day after, standing in the courtyard, trying not to fidget, listening to the distant sound of horse hooves on the path. What seemed like an eternity but was probably only a short while later, a horse appeared on the horizon. Judging by the way Joohyun's smile widened, it belonged to her friend.

The horse came galloping into the courtyard, the hooves clattering on the cobblestones. Seulgi watched enviously as Sooyoung gracefully dismounted while the animal was still slowing down, landing on her feet with barely a stumble as she reined in her horse. And then she watched with a deepening pit in her stomach as the other woman bounded across the distance to throw her arms around Joohyun with a bright laugh.

"Look at you, old lady," she said, grinning, "is that grey in your hair?"

Joohyun laughed, one of her loud laughs that Seulgi knew made her feel a little embarrassed so she rarely let it out. "You haven't changed at all," she told Sooyoung, "you're still a brat."

The two friends hugged as Seulgi quietly asked Yerim to fetch some refreshments. Mark, hand still in a sling but stubbornness intact, took hold of the horse's reins and led it away and Seulgi gave him a look that warned him to be careful, reassured by his firm nod. And then both Joohyun and Sooyoung were turning towards her, and the combined force of their attention made her flush.

"Sooyoung," Joohyun said, smiling, guiding her friend along by tugging on her arm and coming to stand beside Seulgi. "This is Seulgi, my wife."

"It's an honor to finally meet you," Seulgi said, grateful that her voice didn't shake as she thrust her hand out for a handshake. "Welcome to our home."

Sooyoung was tall, taller than both of them, though she'd likely still be dwarfed by John when he came by. Her smile had lost none of its brightness but her eyes were sharp as she took Seulgi in. Her handshake was firm. "It's an honor to meet you as well," she said, "I've heard so much about you from Joohyun."

"All good things," Joohyun broke in, smiling, and Seulgi offered a weak smile in return.

"Why don't we go inside?" she offered quietly. "You must be tired from your journey."

Automatically, she offered Joohyun her arm, knowing that the high and uneven front stairs could be difficult for her, but Sooyoung was already drawing her away, gesticulating expansively as she recounted her journey, and she had to hurry up to catch up with them.

Sooyoung's eyes widened as she entered the foyer. "This place has changed," she said, turning around in a circle to take in the polished floors and restored paintings. "The last time I was here it was falling apart. I thought you'd be better off selling the lot and moving somewhere else."

Seulgi bit her lip, shuddering at the thought. Selling the estate? Giving up the beautiful garden  and the forest?  The rowdy dinners with the whole household? She couldn't imagine wanting to give it up.

"The last time you were here my father had just died," Joohyun said, suddenly serious. "Time has passed since then."

Sooyoung hummed under her breath. "I can see that," was all she said.

"It's all down to Seulgi," Joohyun announced and Seulgi flinched at being drawn into the conversation so suddenly. “If she hadn’t organized the restoration, this place would still be barely habitable. It’s changed a lot in the last couple of months.”

Seulgi shook her head. “It’s nothing I did,” she said, “if the staff hadn’t been willing to help and if you hadn’t given us the funds then nothing would have been done.”

“It all comes down to the funds, doesn’t it?” Sooyoung said airily but the look she gave Seulgi was sharp, almost a glare. Joohyun didn’t notice, but Seulgi felt it in the way her stomach fell to her feet. 

“Why don’t you two catch up in the sitting room?” Seulgi said, pasting a smile on her face. “It’ll be more comfortable.”

She led the way to the main sitting room, hiding her trembling hands in her sleeves, only waiting around until both Joohyun and Sooyoung were settled in the armchairs and she’d poured them tea, settling a plate of freshly baked biscuits between them.

“I haven’t seen this old thing in ages,” Sooyoung said, having walked over to inspect the chess set. She picked up a knight figurine between her fingers and Seulgi bit her tongue on a reprimand. “Do you play yourself?”

“I play with Seulgi when we have time,” Joohyun said, smiling and the pride in her voice was unmistakable, bringing a pleased flush to Seulgi’s face. “She’s a challenge.”

“Oh?” Sooyoung’s eyebrows rose up. “There are several high-ranking military officials that would kill for that kind of praise from you.”

“I only know what Joohyun taught me,” Seulgi said quietly, feeling embarrassed without even knowing why. “I’ll leave you two to catch up. Lunch shouldn’t be long.”

Before vacating the room, she paused by Joohyun’s armchair, putting her hand on her shoulder. It was a thoughtless gesture, a product of all the ways they’ve learned to show affection and Joohyun swayed into it, pressing her cheek to Seulgi’s knuckles. It made Seulgi smile and Joohyun smiled back, soft and bright. Behind them, Sooyoung cleared her throat and Seulgi let her hand fall away. She sneaked one last glance at Sooyoung before she walked out, and found her watching, a strange expression on her face.

Seulgi checked in on the lunch table, set up outside in the shade of entwining clematis in full bloom. She cupped her hand around the wide white bloom and smiled, reminding herself to compliment Donghyuck on his excellent work. The table arrangement was simple, though she’d folded the napkins carefully, and cut out a tasteful bouquet of white and yellow roses for the centerpiece. It was warm outside, but this side of the house got the occasional cooling breeze from the little stream at the edge of the forest and it was pleasant to sit in the shade.

Going over the minutiae gave her time to collect herself. She didn’t know if Sooyoung meant to unsettle her or if she was only looking too deeply into her words, listening for her own insecurities, but it was an unpleasant feeling. She had to get herself together for the meal, because it was only going to be the three of them. The staff had elected to eat in the kitchen, especially the youngest still wary of strangers. Seulgi found herself irrationally pleased by it, that it felt like they had chosen her over the charming newcomer, and she hated feeling like that, like she was using them to score points on an imaginary scoreboard.

Lunch really didn’t take long, since Taeyong worked miracles, and Seulgi’s respite was over, as the three of them settled into their seats. Oddly, Sooyoung seemed much more pleasant than before. She told stories, mostly about Joohyun, which were the ones Seulgi was most interested in. 

She was a charismatic woman and Seulgi could see why Joohyun liked her so much. Her stories were funny and engaging, and now that she was actively including Seulgi in the conversation, she had a small feeling of what it was like to be the focus of her attention. She made Seulgi laugh, despite herself, and she covered up her face with her hands when she realized that the other two women were watching her. Joohyun looked fond, smiling one of her gentle smiles, but Sooyoung looked surprised.

“Oh,” she said, “you have a pretty laugh.”

Taken entirely off her guard, Seulgi pressed her flushed cheeks to Joohyun’s shoulder, the older woman laughing at her gently, wrapping her arm around her. When she looked up, Sooyoung was watching them but instead of the sharpness of before, she looked almost thoughtful.

That is to say, Seulgi found herself liking Sooyoung, almost despite herself. That didn’t prepare her for being left alone with her.

John came over, looking contrite, but there was an urgent messenger from one of the closest villages and Joohyun had to deal with it. Leaving Sooyoung and Seulgi sitting alone at the table, only empty plates between them. 

There was a long beat of silence. 

“You know,” Sooyoung said thoughtfully, leaning back in her chair. “I was prepared to hate you.”

Seulgi swallowed around a dry throat, folding her hands in her lap. She didn’t know what to say, but Sooyoung didn’t seem to need her input anyway.

“Joohyun left me, back in the city,” Sooyoung continued, her voice deceptively light, “to live in this old dump of a house where she’d gone through one of the worst days of her life. I thought it was just a phase of some sort. That she’d be back when she got her affairs in order. That this estate would be on the market in a week. So, imagine my surprise when I get a letter that she was getting married.”

Seulgi sat, motionless, her eyes stuck to Sooyoung’s face, the faraway look in her eyes.

“I asked around about you,” Sooyoung said and the full force of her attention made Seulgi shake, “the daughter of a gambler so deeply in debt, he’d be willing to sell his own offspring on auction to the highest bidder.”

Seulgi stiffened, horror filling her chest. 

“But he didn’t get to do that, did he?” Sooyoung continued, voice gentle. “Because Joohyun stepped in first. For the longest time, I thought it was just her hero complex. No matter how beautiful you were rumored to be, you could be nothing but a money-grabbing wench that would break her heart, and when you did, I was ready to pick up the pieces.”

Seulgi’s breath came in gasps and she tried to calm it, clutching her fingers so hard they hurt.

“It didn’t turn out the way I expected it to,” Sooyoung said and she was smiling, small and crooked, almost sad. “And you aren’t who I expected you to be. You aren’t going to break her heart, are you?”

Seulgi mastered her breathing, meeting Sooyoung’s pinning gaze head-on. “I won’t,” she said quietly. 

“That’s good,” Sooyoung said, and the intensity seemed to flow out of her frame as she slumped in her chair. “I’m glad.”

“I want to make her happy,” Seulgi said, surprised at how steady the words were, but unsurprised at how much she meant them.

“You know what,” Sooyoung said, her smile slowly widening. “I think that maybe you do.”

They sat for a moment in silence. Sooyoung was the first one to break it, again. 

“Did you ever hear about the time I got Joohyun really drunk and we climbed on top of the barracks?” she said, a careful note in her tone. Seulgi recognized it for what it was - an olive branch.

“That sounds like a story I need to know,” Seulgi said, smiling, and Sooyoung’s answering smile finally made her feel like she could breathe.

  
  


*

  
  


It was the kind of summer afternoon that made everyone lazy. It was hot, both inside and outside the house, but at least outside there was a small breeze. Seulgi had abandoned her duties for the afternoon, unable to concentrate and retreated to the garden instead. She’d made herself comfortable in the soft grass at the base of a tall tree that marked the edge of the forest. It was pleasantly cool in the shade and the breeze ruffled her hair every so often as she closed her eyes.

She’d brought Seungwan’s latest letter with her to read, but it couldn’t hold her attention for very long. The shine and excitement had faded from her stories of high society parties, and more and more often she sounded worried, almost sad. Maybe a vacation in the countryside would help. Seulgi fully intended to suggest it in her next letter, which she would write as soon as she stopped feeling so drowsy.

The grass rustled under approaching footsteps and then Joohyun was sitting down next to her. Seulgi leaned into her without opening her eyes, smiling when Joohyun pressed a kiss to her cheek.

“So this is where you’ve run off to,” Joohyun said, amusement in her tone. “What are you doing?”

“I was going to read,” Seulgi muttered. She followed her impulse and let her body fall sideways so that she was lying down with her head in Joohyun’s lap, comfortable. 

“You’d have to open your eyes first to do that,” Joohyun said gently, teasing. She ran her hands through Seulgi’s hair, combing out the strands. Under her usual clean scent, Seulgi could detect the barest hint of horsehair and it made her wrinkle her nose. Joohyun ran her fingers over the crease, smoothing it out.

Seulgi hummed quietly. “What did Mark say?” she asked because the smell meant that Joohyun was coming from the newly renovated stables. 

“Well, the stables are up to his standards now, if barely,” Joohyun said. “He says we’re ready to bring in some mares in the spring, try to do some breeding. He’s also looking forward to teaching you how to ride.”

Seulgi smiled. She was looking forward to it too. Mark loved everything to do with horses almost as much as he loved Donghyuck. Any interest you showed in them and he lit up from the inside. And she really was looking forward to living through her daydreams of riding out by Joohyun’s side.

“Did he and Donghyuck decide on what cottage they wanted?” she asked and Joohyun snorted.

“They did,” she said. “It’s the one closest to the house, and by consequence closest to the kitchen.”

“As if they could live without Taeyong’s cooking,” Seulgi said, laughing. “In fact, do you think we could conveniently skip putting in the stove during the renovations? I’m not entirely sure they won’t burn the whole thing down when it’s done.”

That made Joohyun laugh and Seulgi smiled at the familiar sound. Joohyun’s hands brushed against her cheek and Seulgi turned to press a kiss to her knuckles. A moment later, Joohyun kissed her forehead. 

“What are you thinking about?” Joohyun asked softly. Seulgi opened her eyes to look up at her. Joohyun’s face was framed by the vividly green tree canopy, individual beams of sunlight spilling through the leaves, setting her skin aglow. 

“How life is so much more beautiful than I could have imagined,” Seulgi whispered back. Joohyun cupped her cheeks in her hands, smiling at her as she leaned in for a kiss. 

Seulgi let her eyes slip shut as their lips brushed. She could hear Joohyun’s gentle breathing, the rustle of her blouse, and beyond them, the gentle sound of the stream and the wind sighing through the trees. In a few hours, the afternoon would fade into twilight and the fireflies would emerge to cast their strange lights on the grass.

Here, in the moment, with Joohyun’s hands on her cheeks, her soft gentle mouth on her own, the rest of their lives stretching out before them like a dream, Seulgi marveled at how it was possible that she be so completely and utterly content. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> If you liked this, leave me a comment down below. I'm also on [twitter](https://twitter.com/leewoong)// [CC](curiouscat.me/hwansloth), if you want to talk more soft regency lesbians with me. I'm already planning a sequel.


End file.
